> our well-being is a relative proposition
Yes. But you can change the framework you work with. You can relativize the situation (e.g. take into account that some one had a better starting position in life than you). You can compare different things (e.g. wealth vs wisdom). Even you can compare agains worst scenarios instead of ideal situations. To be happy at all costs will be delusional. But I believe that to achieve small goals, to move forward to the person that you want to be should improve your well-being.
> nothing I do will make my life as meaningful as it "should" be
If you change "should" by "can" then I agree. We never will achieve our "full potential" as seen on some not-so-good self-help books. Because that is unrealistic. We will make mistakes. We will change goals. That idealised state is no achievable but I think that having it as a moving target is helpful.
> typical negative connotation of envy--that is, jealousy--in order to be harmful
Agree. I made a bad use of words. I meant jealousy.
> I can be genuinely happy for the success I perceive in others, while simultaneously receiving the message that my own life is lacking.
I agree. And that's a good thing about comparisons. You can find things that you lack and you can try to achieve them.
> nothing I do will make my life as meaningful as it "should" be If you change "should" by "can" then I agree. We never will achieve our "full potential" as seen on some not-so-good self-help books. Because that is unrealistic. We will make mistakes. We will change goals. That idealised state is no achievable but I think that having it as a moving target is helpful.
> typical negative connotation of envy--that is, jealousy--in order to be harmful Agree. I made a bad use of words. I meant jealousy.
> I can be genuinely happy for the success I perceive in others, while simultaneously receiving the message that my own life is lacking. I agree. And that's a good thing about comparisons. You can find things that you lack and you can try to achieve them.