Not entirely arbitrary. Don't get me wrong, I like responsiveness, but extreme acceleration is necessarily less safe. Slower acceleration makes a vehicle more predictable, not just for the driver but for other vehicles and pedestrians too.
Certain road situations require faster accelerations to get out of safely and while you can employ safety techniques and driving style to avoid getting into them, they still do exist.
Tesla Model S Performance with its 0-60 under 3 seconds can still accelerate and drive very slowly and smoothly if the driver chooses to do so, while Mazda with artificially "slowed" acceleration can never go fast. At the end of the day, the car with more artificial limitations gives you less options and is inherently less safe.
The decision is usually guided by practical limitations, such as grip, or the tolerance of parts. Limiting torque to improve acceleration, prevent skidding off the road, or not burn out the motor is a reasonable motivation in-line with the interests of the driver. Limiting torque to make your car feel like a less capable one is not.
That said, I can imagine some people may want a familiar driving experience, although it would make sense to make that a configurable option, e.g. 'sport mode' vs 'comfort mode'.
The same logic would also dictate that every ICE vehicle produced today is artificially slower because of its electronic traction controls and detuned engine computers; when actually having that unrestrained power would lead to pretty dangerous scenarios requiring a high level of driving skill that the 90% of us do not have. Turn off all stability controls on a vehicle nearing 300 HP and go wide-open-throttle, and you'll find yourself sideways in no time.
This type of power curve would also lead to increased wear on a some pretty expensive drivetrain components, so either the manufacturer has to greatly increase vehicle cost to cover for more resilient parts, or sell something that will tank the public's perception of the reliability of their brand.
Aftermarket pure software tunes can unlock some ridiculous amounts of horsepower and torque on modern cars, but expect your axles, brakes, suspension, or transmission components to need replacement much more frequently.
EV design is totally different from ICE design in this regard. EV design is all about how to avoid shorting the battery across the motor. ICE UX mirrors a physical process: the throttle pedal lets more air into the engine. In an electric car you're working with a more abstract process.
I'm not really sure what you're saying here, and I may be missing the point. High torque and high speed introduce additional wear and earlier breakage on EVs just as they do on ICE vehicles. The steering, acceleration pedal, and brake pedal are just as digitally controlled on either kind of vehicle, and are calibrated for an arbitrary "feeling" on both kinds of cars. Cars are no longer made with mechanical versions of these inputs. For reliability (and consequently, cost-savings) as well as safety purposes, these controls are calibrated to perform at less than their peak possible outputs.
An ICE does require more air and fuel for acceleration as does an EV's motor use higher currents as the pedal is depressed, that is true. The nice thing about EVs is that you get aboout twice as powerful performance for your money.
TL;DR: I agree with your statement that all EVs are artifically slowed, just adding that all vehicles including ICEs are also artificially slowed in order to behave a certain way on normal roads.
