I know these types of people (I used to be one to a lesser degree) and I don't think it's fair to say that she knows what she's doing. As a highly intelligent person, if this is pointed out to her she'll no doubt rationalise it all somehow, but that doesn't mean it's a conscious choice.
I've lived with an anti-money mindset for most of my life (it's changing, slowly), and it wasn't a conscious choice. I never sat down and thought "ok, I don't want money, so I'm going to steer away from opportunities to make money, spend money that arrives to me as quickly as possible, and basically generally push it away". Once it was pointed out to me repeatedly that I did this, I started working on changing this subconscious choice. It's still an ongoing process, and far from over.
It takes some pretty strong-headed, tireless friends to keep pointing out to you that you're being stupid and it's hurting your life. It takes a number of obvious, unignorable examples of people less talented than you doing much better.
Without those constant nudges over a period of years, most people will rationalise things just as you do, about themselves or about others. I wish on this woman that her friends will figure out how to get it through to her that she could have a much better life, and that her own subconscious choices and thought patterns are holding her back, rather than any external circumstances.
For example, one such belief is the idea that money is evil, the cause of problems. That's a load of crap. Money is a token of value that can be exchanged for whatever the hell you want. It's a resource that can be used to do great good or great evil - but that entirely depends on the person doing things. Money is a lever that you can use to multiply your impact on the world - but as long as you keep pushing money away from you, you don't get to use that lever effectively. If you understand this idea, that goes a long way towards starting to resolve manmal's friend's money issues...
I said greed for money makes us bad humans. Not money.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with "not wanting to impact the world", and it's a shame that so many are implying that it is. It's "enjoying life", plain and simple.
I don't care about money; I let it run out a few months ago. Didn't phase me. I simply got a job when I needed to, and now I have $11k saved up. I'm very lucky to be a programmer. But more than that, I'm lucky to be able to enjoy life by studying as much science as I want to. Does that make me a bad person? By your implication, it does, because I don't care about money, and spend it freely.
On a different note... It sounds like you've been through a struggle, and came out stronger. I just wanted to say congratulations. I respect that a lot.
Of course it doesn't make you a bad person - and it sounds like your choice is somewhat more deliberate. That said, I'd point out that it looks like you're plenty capable of making a lot more money whenever you want to, and if you set your mind on buying a house you'd come up with the cash for it within a couple of years.
That's a world away from the situation described in previous posts. It sounds like you have your priorities straight, which is commendable, rather than being at the mercy of a self-sacrificing mindset...
On a different note... It sounds like you've been through a struggle, and came out stronger. I just wanted to say congratulations. I respect that a lot.
I've lived with an anti-money mindset for most of my life (it's changing, slowly), and it wasn't a conscious choice. I never sat down and thought "ok, I don't want money, so I'm going to steer away from opportunities to make money, spend money that arrives to me as quickly as possible, and basically generally push it away". Once it was pointed out to me repeatedly that I did this, I started working on changing this subconscious choice. It's still an ongoing process, and far from over.
It takes some pretty strong-headed, tireless friends to keep pointing out to you that you're being stupid and it's hurting your life. It takes a number of obvious, unignorable examples of people less talented than you doing much better.
Without those constant nudges over a period of years, most people will rationalise things just as you do, about themselves or about others. I wish on this woman that her friends will figure out how to get it through to her that she could have a much better life, and that her own subconscious choices and thought patterns are holding her back, rather than any external circumstances.
For example, one such belief is the idea that money is evil, the cause of problems. That's a load of crap. Money is a token of value that can be exchanged for whatever the hell you want. It's a resource that can be used to do great good or great evil - but that entirely depends on the person doing things. Money is a lever that you can use to multiply your impact on the world - but as long as you keep pushing money away from you, you don't get to use that lever effectively. If you understand this idea, that goes a long way towards starting to resolve manmal's friend's money issues...