Similarly, I tell people that I can count on one hand the number of times I've had a project fail (or nearly fail) because I or someone on the team couldn't open a database connection, or write to a file, or shrink an image, or what have you (it's happened, but very rarely, and usually because of some arcane weirdness or a truly incompetent person).
Overwhelmingly, projects I've been involved in that failed or nearly failed did so because of basic communication problems - misunderstanding someone, not clarifying, not getting enough detail, making assumptions, etc. Yet these skills are hardly ever taught anywhere. Hard tech skills in schools, certification progams, etc. all cover less than half of what makes a truly useful developer.
I work for a large corporation that paid for my Masters in Software Engineering.
Despite that, the most important training I have received is from taking the in-house courses on subjects like Interviewing, making decisions, being effective, basic management skills, etc. The one thing they have all had in common was that they taught (and stressed) better communication skills.
Seemingly simple, "soft" stuff like learning how to listen better has been more useful in my day to day work as a programmer than a technical graduate degree. Go figure!
It's a nasty habit that I've been trying to curb this year, with some effectiveness. Whenever I catch myself making an assumption, I either come up with other assumptions and weight them, or wait until I can get some clarity on the issue.
I find that I have a nasty habit of giving a "voice" to a textual conversation. I'll start reading it as if the other person is happy, or angry. Then I'll continue down that path.
Recently it got to a point where I was seriously convinced that every text a friend was sending me was an angry quip. Every fiber of my being was slowly filling up with anger and resentment. When in fact they weren't angry at all, they were just short on time and words. I was getting upset over an imagined (assumed) problem.
I felt incredibly silly, and that is what made me decide to stop making assumptions in my communications.
Overwhelmingly, projects I've been involved in that failed or nearly failed did so because of basic communication problems - misunderstanding someone, not clarifying, not getting enough detail, making assumptions, etc. Yet these skills are hardly ever taught anywhere. Hard tech skills in schools, certification progams, etc. all cover less than half of what makes a truly useful developer.