Good communication is universal. Weather you are dealing with kids or coworkers the formula is often the same. Things like justify the emotion but not the behavior. "I understand you're upset that feature A is missing, but you do not need to raise your voice in order for us to listen to you."
When people get frustrated they get an emotional build up of energy that must be discharged, typically behaviorally. Similar to flight-or-fight, acting before thinking. The connections between emotional and behavioral is very strong while the connection between cognitive and behavioral is weak. The ability of their "adult-self" to step in and take control is hindered.
So you'll find more often than not that a heated discussion is sometimes two different discussions entirely, each side trying to assert their point to the other that is trying to assert a different point on them. But yes, even in these situations, reflective listening is the key to changing it from a battle into a healthy exchange.
That's the point - IMHO this was NOT "good communication". There were some techniques in there that could be helpful in general but this was by no means a good conversation or a good example of communication. This was an example of how to not get involved and get people off your back - if you do this with your angry customer, trying to make THEM come up with their own answer, well good luck with that.
When people get frustrated they get an emotional build up of energy that must be discharged, typically behaviorally. Similar to flight-or-fight, acting before thinking. The connections between emotional and behavioral is very strong while the connection between cognitive and behavioral is weak. The ability of their "adult-self" to step in and take control is hindered.
So you'll find more often than not that a heated discussion is sometimes two different discussions entirely, each side trying to assert their point to the other that is trying to assert a different point on them. But yes, even in these situations, reflective listening is the key to changing it from a battle into a healthy exchange.